Kurt's Cars - Fernando The 4x4

"Fernando" | 1978 Chevrolet K20 Camper Special | V8/Auto

The next in the Kurt's Cars series is a machine of unmatched character and weight: Fernando The 4x4.

Do you ever wonder why some people never get cut off in traffic? I did, until I bought Fernando - my 6600 pound friend. Rarely did Mercedes and BMW owners pull out in front of a truck like Fernando, who commanded respect with mirror-height headlights and a big bent fender (more on that later). The previous owner had been a General Contractor for many years and Fernando had been his every day vehicle; when he retired from that and switched jobs around 1998, he sold me the truck, the camper, and his tool box for $1600. It had surprisingly little rust and a whole host of options that only came on trucks equipped with both the Camper Special and Silverado options. He wasn't using it anymore and I wanted a 4x4 to replace my 2WD Ford F250.

The camper and the truck matched; both were copper/white two tone. Even with the bent fender it still was a decent looking rig. Now, about that fender: In 1995 a Mazda minivan pulled out in front of the previous owner; he slammed into the driver's side just behind the door, and totaled the minivan. The fender, the bumper, and the tip of the hood were the only things bent on the truck and he was able to drive away after it was all over. When he had the frame checked, the shop indicated that there were no bends. Yay, Fernando! Rough, tough, and now pocked with character. I trimmed the fender away from the passenger door jamb to improve hinge operation, but other than that I left the metal intact.

Fernando was a trustworthy, albeit thirsty, companion. It got 6mpg no matter how it was driven. With 160,000 miles, it did use some oil but started each day and transported me and half the world with the utmost dependability. In fact Fernando instilled so much faith in me that I wrote a goofy little poem just for fun; oddly it got published in a literary journal when I submitted it on a whim (they must have been desperate):

God Sent Me A Truck

God sent me a truck
Its paint is quite a fright
But it starts up every morning
And gets home every night

God sent me a truck
That eats up lots of gas
But add two tanks of no lead fuel
And dead cars it will push and pass

God sent me a truck
And a fender filled with holes
But regardless of that rusted part
I can pack the bed with big wood poles

God's gifts aren't all pretty
And at first they can seem lame
But His reasons all make sense
If you thank Him just the same

God sent me a truck
I drive it every day
He's blessed my truck with lots of love
And in my driveway it will stay

A few months after I wrote the poem, Fernando's engine finally gave out. The "Death Knuckle" was rattling around down deep in its small block 400. My first choice was to rebuild the motor and continue driving it. After much thought, and an buy offer from a friend, I decided to sell the whole thing -- camper and all in the year 2000. I then drove Fernando 50 miles to its new home in Tacoma on a tired motor with little more than a whimper...and 9 gallons of gas.

Yay Fernando!